Welcome to this month's edition of Adventurous Life!
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In this issue:
But First a Quick Announcement...
As of January 2004, Adventurous Life will be moving to a bi-monthly (6 times a year) publication schedule. As always, your thoughts, questions, suggestions, "top ten reasons to get up in the morning," and personal stories are more than welcome, so please do keep in touch during this (hopefully fabulous) new year!
Our big adventure these past few months has been that of searching for and beginning the process of buying a house -- our first, and it's an old one with lots of -- shall we say? -- challenges.
Which means that one thing after another went wrong -- first the foundation had major issues, then the well test came back with an incredibly high bacteria count. We panicked over money and repairs and this sense that we might be buying a life-sucking money pit. Everyone we spoke with said, "Do you know what you're getting yourselves into?"
We haggled and bartered and groaned and sobbed. Appliances were pushed back and forth across the table like bargaining chips. We did our best to take our frustrations out on the river (kayaking, of course) rather than each other, but it didn't always work.
And everyone I described our ordeal to said, "That's all completely normal."
But the strangest part of the whole thing was the fact that we started to get paranoid. Our realtor had warned us (in ominous tones) that, in the end, "It's always Buyer Beware." The other realtor was a close family friend of the sellers, and had savagely protected their interests from the start. It seemed like everyone we worked with had been through this whole process a million times, and knew the system inside and out. What if everyone was taking advantage of our naivete? What if we were fools?
The scarier things got, the closer we came to forgetting that the folks selling the house were nice people we'd spent two hours talking with during the well test, that they were first-time sellers who were just as intimidated by the whole process as we were. We almost forgot that people do do this every day. We almost forgot that it's "all completely normal."
And in those moments of feeling lost and vulnerable, those moments of anger wherein it seemed as if no one and nothing would give us a break, I was reminded of what it's like to travel to strange new countries, especially places where one has to fend off touts and bargain for every little thing. How easy it is to become angry and scared and self-protective when we don't know the landscape -- especially when it seems like everyone else does -- and we feel that something's at stake.
The thing is, we have a choice in those moments. The assumptions we make decide whether we choose to operate from a place of fear and paranoia, or we choose to remember that most people are good and decent and honest -- and then operate from a place of generosity and trust. After all, who loses most when paranoia reigns? The occasional con artists who don't get as much as they might have because of our over-vigilance? Or us, for having allowed our lives to cave in from the pressures of fear?
This month, pay attention to the scary moments of your life -- the moments when you're at your very worst, panicky and vulnerable -- and see if you can slip a little gentleness and faith into the scenario. Remember, it's your life. Perhaps it's too precious to spend mistrusting people.
Kelly Stang didn’t set out to become a heroine to over 1100 women. She was just doing her job. Well, actually, she wasn’t -- it wasn’t in her job description (she's a wildlife biologist with the New York State Department of Environmental Conservation (DEC)). But I'm getting a bit ahead of myself -- perhaps we should start at the beginning?
In 1991, a program was initiated by Dr. Christine Thomas at the University of Wisconsin-Stevens Point with the goal of introducing women to outdoor skills -- fishing, canoeing, hunting, camping, hiking. Since most men learn these things by going out with their fathers or uncles or brothers, reasoned the founders, how could anyone expect women to pick up these skills unless someone took the time to teach them? Thus, Becoming an Outdoorswoman (BOW) was born. And the idea spread like wildfire. Today, more than 20,000 women attend over 80 weekend-long BOW workshops every year across North America.
But in throwing around numbers like that, it's easy to forget the many anonymous individuals toiling behind the scenes to make such opportunities happen...
Read the complete article on my web site.
Travel Q&A: Bali
Occasionally I get e-mails from friends and readers asking for advice on their latest travel plans. If I've been there (and sometimes even if I haven't!), I'm always happy to offer advice on where to go and what to see. In this section, I'll share my answers with you -- in case you (or someone you know) might be interested in the same information. And hey, if you have something to add or update, feel free to e-mail me with your thoughts and suggestions so I can add them to the web site!
Q: I am planning for a trip to Bali and am looking for the best airfare. Can you help me with that? Any tips you can give me would be appreciated (i.e. what to look out for, what to see while there, places to stay away from, etc.)
Read the answer on my web site.
"Laughter is the closest distance between two people."
- Victor Borge
Top 5 Ideas to Inspire You This Month
- Take a "well day" from work and indulge in your favorite activity
- Go rummaging through an old barn or attic and let your imagination run wild
- Learn to juggle
- Rearrange your schedule so you can volunteer one whole day a week at a not-for-profit -- or start your own!
- Start dreaming up your next vacation -- make sure it involves something you've never done before
"The chief danger in life is that you may take too many precautions."
- Alfred Adler
#315 Put something you made in your office. Display a painting, a photograph, a sculpture, or anything you made that makes you proud and reminds you of your creativity.
This everyday adventure is from "A New Adventure Every Day: 541 Simple Ways to Live with Pizzazz" by David Silberkleit, excerpted with the author's permission.
About the author:
Judy Wolf is a world traveler, freelance writer, speaker, and whitewater kayak instructor. She's taken numerous, extended solo journeys around the world, traveling by foot, bus, jeep, camel, truck, boat, train, plane, elephant, and bicycle to over 30 countries on five continents. She currently lives in upstate New York with her husband and border collie, where she's working on a book of travel essays about her most recent adventures…that is, when she's not plunging off waterfalls or entertaining the dog.
Learn more at www.judywolf.com.
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Copyright © 2004 Judy Wolf
